Wow! It has been so incredibly hot here on the East coast that it has been difficult to be outside. It's been strange in that all winter we were buried under more snow than Buffalo and now that the season for fun in the sun is here, it's too hot to enjoy. Even as a kid I don't remember the summer being this hot. I do remember cooling off in a pool, running through a sprinkler and eating popsicles to beat the heat and enjoying the longer hours of sunlight. As an adult I am realizing that heat makes people (kids and adults alike) cranky!!
I couldn't help but link the analogy of keeping cool temperature wise and temperament wise. This week I have had to do both! Besides having work done at my home, I have had to manage my two little ones who just can't take the heat. Their behavior was challenging which was frustrating for me while I was still trying to complete some remodeling at our house after 6 weeks. The house was in chaos with clutter abounding from things having to be shifted around which I can not stand.
My schedule is tight so if I make an appointment, there is much planning to pull it off. I had a hair appointment the other day and for the second month in a row the salon had a scheduling problem which resulted in me not having the stylist I had scheduled with to cut my hair. The first time was easier to swallow and I was ok with someone else taking care of me but the second time in a row was harder for me to swallow since the stylist left after waiting 15 minutes thinking I was not showing for a 4:15 appointment that was originally scheduled for 4:30.This affected my husband having to leave work early, a photographer ( I was supposed to have a head shot taken after my hair appointment for some PR literature) my sister who I was unable to connect with who was visiting from out of town and this time I was H-O-T.
I wanted to keep my cool but express that I was rightfully angry and needed some kind of resolution to the problem. I wanted to be assertive, not aggressive. In order to keep my cool I took a time out and thought about how I wanted to convey my situation and what outcome I wanted. As long as we could take steps to ensure it doesn't happen again, that the salon could take ownership for the problem and exercise good customer service response to the situation, I could be cool. I needed to explain all of the inconvenience and work toward a solution together. It all worked out well and we re-scheduled for the following morning and I was not charged.
This week I have found myself taking lots of time outs to be able to manage various challenges. This has actually led to me just sitting on the front steps with a popsicle with my 3 year old and taking in the time with him. I have also spent some quiet alone time to exercise my spirit. I feel like the heat is on but I have tools to manage!
How do you beat the heat? This week think about what you did to stave off heat in the summer and how you keep your cool in heated situations. If you don't have any tools in your tool box for the latter, simply reflect before reacting and practice, practice, practice!
Have a great week and stay cool!
Warmly,
Andrea
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Sunday, June 20, 2010
What comes next? Give it time.....
I was honored to be invited to speak to the Chesapeake Moms Club this past week. A wonderful group of women came out to talk about taking steps toward getting reacquainted with themselves and finding ways to investigate what comes next. The room was a mix of wonderfully talented women who were also parents. They wanted to learn how to really get clear about what their likes and dislikes are and what things they were tolerating. Some wanted to think about changing careers altogether and some were contemplating re-entering the workforce since their children would all be in school in the fall.
We addressed the issue of self care and getting enough sleep first and foremost. We also talked about getting serious about our health and setting strong boundaries in our relationships. We need time to meet our own needs so we can meet the needs of our families and the demands of our careers. We also need to create space to invoke the creative energy necessary to identify our next step.
We discussed paying attention to our surroundings so that we can get clues to what ignites our energy. I encouraged these women to pay attention to the television programs they are watching, the conversations they are having and the people they are drawn to for the next 14 days. I asked them to journal about these things and to take note of the themes that presented.
There were women who were used to plans being laid out and followed sequentially. I asked them to be patient with the process and to be sure to have some quiet time so that creativity would have room to bloom.
Each of these women were eager and ready to take on the task at hand. The discussion that ensued was a good one for anyone who is considering a change due to dissatisfaction in their work, relationships or in themselves. Here are some ideas to help identify what really stirs your spirit.
This week ask yourself:
-What hobby or career would I encourage my children or nieces or nephews to pursue?
-What section of the newspaper do I go to first?
-What do I absolutely make time for in my day no matter what?
-Who do I know that is doing something I would love to do either as a hobby or as a career?
Keep track for yourselves. Identify any themes that result and pursue one by developing 5 action steps that would allow you to work toward that interest. Most importantly, be sure to give yourself the space you need (is your home free of clutter, are there relationships that you need to re-evaluate to set firm limits on and are you taking 15 minutes a day to be still and quiet in nature?)If you commit to the process, what comes next will evolve as it should.
Have a great week!
Warmly,
Andrea
We addressed the issue of self care and getting enough sleep first and foremost. We also talked about getting serious about our health and setting strong boundaries in our relationships. We need time to meet our own needs so we can meet the needs of our families and the demands of our careers. We also need to create space to invoke the creative energy necessary to identify our next step.
We discussed paying attention to our surroundings so that we can get clues to what ignites our energy. I encouraged these women to pay attention to the television programs they are watching, the conversations they are having and the people they are drawn to for the next 14 days. I asked them to journal about these things and to take note of the themes that presented.
There were women who were used to plans being laid out and followed sequentially. I asked them to be patient with the process and to be sure to have some quiet time so that creativity would have room to bloom.
Each of these women were eager and ready to take on the task at hand. The discussion that ensued was a good one for anyone who is considering a change due to dissatisfaction in their work, relationships or in themselves. Here are some ideas to help identify what really stirs your spirit.
This week ask yourself:
-What hobby or career would I encourage my children or nieces or nephews to pursue?
-What section of the newspaper do I go to first?
-What do I absolutely make time for in my day no matter what?
-Who do I know that is doing something I would love to do either as a hobby or as a career?
Keep track for yourselves. Identify any themes that result and pursue one by developing 5 action steps that would allow you to work toward that interest. Most importantly, be sure to give yourself the space you need (is your home free of clutter, are there relationships that you need to re-evaluate to set firm limits on and are you taking 15 minutes a day to be still and quiet in nature?)If you commit to the process, what comes next will evolve as it should.
Have a great week!
Warmly,
Andrea
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Summertime!
My family and I had a wonderful weekend traveling to see more family and friends. We covered a lot of ground in 3 days but it didn't feel harried and all of it was quality. It was yet another reminder to schedule fun but to travel the road to have a good time, not to make good time (Sally from the Cars movie couldn't have said it better):-) We didn't over book activities or visits and yet we felt as though we got away for longer than we did.
Often times the summer months find us hitting the road or the skies or even staying closer to home these days with economics as they are. I have referenced a few times already the crazy pace we keep. Sometimes we make the mistake of scheduling whirlwind vacations where we squeeze in as much as we can in just a week's time or even worse, on a long weekend. We're not giving ourselves the necessary time we need to refuel. Sometimes it takes a few days just to 'get into the vacation frame of mind' and unwind and we no sooner do that and we're back at our grind. Some folks are using vacation to do projects at home or to play 'catch up' in another area of their lives that they've neglected.
We need to reboot in order to continue to function. How will you choose to reboot this week and what are your summer plans? If you've made plans already, revisit your itinerary and see if you're trying to do too much. If you haven't scheduled anything fun yet, start to plan and if you feel the pinch at the wallet, what are some local interests that you've neglected to explore? Whatever you do this summer, be sure to return to your regular routine refreshed. This week, be sure to get at least 15 minutes a day to steal away for a walk, a road side lemonade or to take in a sunset.
Have a great week!
~Andrea
Often times the summer months find us hitting the road or the skies or even staying closer to home these days with economics as they are. I have referenced a few times already the crazy pace we keep. Sometimes we make the mistake of scheduling whirlwind vacations where we squeeze in as much as we can in just a week's time or even worse, on a long weekend. We're not giving ourselves the necessary time we need to refuel. Sometimes it takes a few days just to 'get into the vacation frame of mind' and unwind and we no sooner do that and we're back at our grind. Some folks are using vacation to do projects at home or to play 'catch up' in another area of their lives that they've neglected.
We need to reboot in order to continue to function. How will you choose to reboot this week and what are your summer plans? If you've made plans already, revisit your itinerary and see if you're trying to do too much. If you haven't scheduled anything fun yet, start to plan and if you feel the pinch at the wallet, what are some local interests that you've neglected to explore? Whatever you do this summer, be sure to return to your regular routine refreshed. This week, be sure to get at least 15 minutes a day to steal away for a walk, a road side lemonade or to take in a sunset.
Have a great week!
~Andrea
Sunday, June 6, 2010
What exactly is enough?
I have been thinking a lot about what fills us up. We are all running at such frantic paces. We are always chasing our tails to keep up with a society that wants even more for us and from us. It wants more of our time so we can be better revenue generators, better multi-taskers, and better academically, athletically, socially etc. In return we want the best instruments that will allows us to keep said frantic pace and thus our free time is utilized by searching for the latest electronic gadgets to allow us to do so - and even better than the next guy or gal.
I can tell you that I still am a fan of snail mail. There is nothing like going to the mailbox and getting a card or note in the mail. I've always loved getting mail and love it even more now because I relish that someone 'took the time' to reach out to me. I enjoy the benefits of all of this technology but still try to connect on a human level with people. I am a reluctant texter. If I have something I'd like to talk with you about, expect a call. I won't say I never text, but I truly try to keep it to a minimum.
The effects of all of this 'advancement' is wreaking havoc on our relationships. We are so busy that we keep filling ourselves up with stuff. Even our silence is filled. Advertisers can even reach us in our cars if you have a more recent model that is able to identify the artist and song title playing on your radio. Occasionally messages from advertisers will stream across the display when commercials are playing simultaneously. We are so bombarded with information and are becoming convinced that what the advertisers say the latest thing we need is something we truly need and are entitled to having.
Whew....exhale for a minute. What is it that truly makes you feel satisfied? How do you define a good day? What are the five absolute essential people and things in your life, that if they were taken away would truly leave you unable to survive? I remember reading an article asking if your house caught fire, what would you try to save. The writer replied that he'd try to save the fire. I thought, that seems strange and read on eagerly. He wanted to save the fire so that he could constantly be reminded of what was important. Instead of living as if the fire were behind him, he wanted to live and treasure what was most important to him in the present.
This week take stock of your five most important people and things. Make a list and keep it in your wallet or purse and maybe even try to contact someone on your list in person - either face to face or by phone.
Keep the fire....
Have a great week!
Warmly,
Andrea
I can tell you that I still am a fan of snail mail. There is nothing like going to the mailbox and getting a card or note in the mail. I've always loved getting mail and love it even more now because I relish that someone 'took the time' to reach out to me. I enjoy the benefits of all of this technology but still try to connect on a human level with people. I am a reluctant texter. If I have something I'd like to talk with you about, expect a call. I won't say I never text, but I truly try to keep it to a minimum.
The effects of all of this 'advancement' is wreaking havoc on our relationships. We are so busy that we keep filling ourselves up with stuff. Even our silence is filled. Advertisers can even reach us in our cars if you have a more recent model that is able to identify the artist and song title playing on your radio. Occasionally messages from advertisers will stream across the display when commercials are playing simultaneously. We are so bombarded with information and are becoming convinced that what the advertisers say the latest thing we need is something we truly need and are entitled to having.
Whew....exhale for a minute. What is it that truly makes you feel satisfied? How do you define a good day? What are the five absolute essential people and things in your life, that if they were taken away would truly leave you unable to survive? I remember reading an article asking if your house caught fire, what would you try to save. The writer replied that he'd try to save the fire. I thought, that seems strange and read on eagerly. He wanted to save the fire so that he could constantly be reminded of what was important. Instead of living as if the fire were behind him, he wanted to live and treasure what was most important to him in the present.
This week take stock of your five most important people and things. Make a list and keep it in your wallet or purse and maybe even try to contact someone on your list in person - either face to face or by phone.
Keep the fire....
Have a great week!
Warmly,
Andrea
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